We are all different with our own history when it comes to social life and friendship, no matter if we have Autism or not. When I take a look at my life and the people around me as well as my character as a person, I can see a pattern throughout my life, let me come back to this later. Let me start from the foundation, I am an introvert and I don’t have the need to be around people all the time to feel good, I like to be on my own and I have always followed my own path in life instead of walking in other people’s footprints. At the same time I can bring out some extroverted traits when needed and if I participates in a party I can sometimes be the center of attention and I can actually enjoy that, but usually I just put on the extroverted mask for short period of times, because deep down i like to be calm and just ride along, it takes a lot of energy to play the outgoing man, but those moments have still been fun and they have benefited me in a good way, both when it comes to meeting new people and forming friendship. Looking at the journey that I have made as a person and the people I got to know during my life up to today I can see a pattern. I am more capable at socializing now compared to when I was younger, I have more experiences to fall back on and I am a different person on the whole, but the long lasting friendships that I have formed, all started very early in my life. I have met people in many social circles, different schools growing up, different jobs, at the gym, when i did martial arts and other hobbies. The friends that are still part of my life, all started when I was just a child. I have 8 close good friends and I met them from the age of 6-14, they are still around and the friendship that we have is very strong, there is no need to pretend, I can be myself with them, they know me so well and we have a long history together. After the age of 15 I met some more friends but the friendship with them was a shorter kind and most of these friendships died out more or less with time. I have some sporadic contact with a couple of them, but they are not part of my everyday life anymore. When I studied at the university I moved to another city where I did not know anyone, but I found meeting new people was easy because most of us were in the same situation. I shared a big apartment with three other people and one of them became a close new friend there in the city of Jönköping here in Sweden. Me and Daniel spent time each day and had a good time together, we watched a lot of movies, talked and just enjoyed each other’s company. The initial thought was that I wanted to stay in that city for several years, but I became sick and had to return home after just one year. But it was a very good experience and I made friends in my class to, but many years have past since then and I don’t have any contact with none of them, it would be fun to have a chat with a couple of them, but I don’t know how to find them and to be honest I am okay with letting it be part of the past. If I go back to the friends that has been a long all the way, there are so many good memories, I like to travel by myself, but I have also done some fantastic travels with friends, one of my closest friends Tommy and I traveled to Greece two times to party when we were young, we were out every night and there where not much sleep during those trips that is for sure. He is an amazing friend and I have always felt so natural around him, we can share all aspects of life and not be judged. I have also traveled with several of my friends to Finland by boat, which was awesome. Robert is another of my closest friends and we did an amazing trip to the USA, we stayed there for three weeks and we went to Los Angeles, San Francisco and Las Vegas and had a blast. Flew over the Grand Canyon with a small plane, visited universal studios and walked around fisherman’s wharf, saw the walk of fame and much more. Even do I am a lone wolf by nature, I am happy to have friends in my life. Nowadays we don’t meet as often as we did in the past. When we were teenagers we hung out almost every day, now most of us have families and do not have the time to meet up on a regular basis, but even if we do not see each other so often, it still feels natural and fun when we do meet. I don’t have the need to meet all the time either, I like to spend time on my own and with my little family that consist of my young daughter and my girlfriend, but even though I am Autistic, that does not mean that I want to be alone all the time. Thank you to all my friends that have been there for me through thick and thin, you have a special place in my heart.
Daniel Antonsson is a 43 year old Autistic man living in Sweden with his Venezuelan girlfriend and four year old daughter. He has always enjoyed writing about different subjects and being able to publish for the Art of Autism make him feel truly blessed.
